[BaadAssGremlins] Something Rebel from "Doc", The Story Of The LUMP

[AMC74HORNET@xxxxxxxxx]

I bought a 2 year old 69 Rebel SST with 24,000 miles on it from my
father. It was a 290 V8 2bbl carb with an aluminum Warner that failed at
17,000 miles and was rebuilt out of my fathers pocket as AMC would not
honor the 2 year 24.000 mile warrantee. My father being a mechanic was
fooled by the new so called 2 year or 30,000 mile factory lubed chassis
and was also to cheap to get the optional electric wipers. The front end
fell apart at 29,000 miles from lack of lubrication, I hit a small pot
hole and broke a front spring. The carb went bad and the fuel filter
clogged up because my father never changed the crummy little bolt in
fuel filter on the Motorcraft carb. The factory battery went bad as did
the starter and also the infamous Motorola alternator and the water
pump. The tranny gave up again at 34,000 miles. And due to cam walk the
brass slider broke off the fuel pump arm and destroyed the timing chain
bending a few push rods the first time. The second time 5,000 miles
later when it happened again it bent all the valves. Every time you
turned around there was somthing going wrong and needing repairing. The
factory shocks were no good and the car must have  had a curse on it as
the 4 new tires were also defective. After the second timing chain
incident I sold the car after doing the heads. It now had 39,000 miles
on it and I had owned it about 2 years. I then bought the yellow 74
Hornet I still have. I told the person I sold the car to that it needed
to be driven gently for 1,000-1,500 miles because of the new valves,
guides and other new parts. The guy's wife told my wife after they had
the car for 3 days that it sure went fast since she had it up to 85-95
mph. Needless to say after 3 weeks she burned the valves and hit
somthing destroying the pass side front fender. Last I saw of the Lump
it was abandoned on a side street 10 blocks from where I live. It
probably went to the crusher. Good riddance. This was the worst car I
ever owned. The only big complaint on my yellow Hornet after all these
years is that !#$%^!@#$ Motorola Alternator that only lasts 10,000
Miles. I got 110,000 miles on the car now.
"Doc"



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• From: "Brien Tourville" <hh7x@xxxxxxxxxxx>
• Date: Thu, 16 Dec 2004 23:25:24 -0500

Gremlin

I'm embarrassed to admit it but back in the 1980's, I had an AMC
Gremlin. I hated that car. It had an accordion type sunroof made of
fabric that had to be pushed back to open. I was driving home from
work when the sunroof ripped from its mooring and began flapping like
a massive flag behind my car before completely freeing itself from
bondage. I think the sunroof hated the car as well.

The sunroof was a rare item and at the time I was unable to afford a
new one. I riveted a piece of sheet metal to the roof as a
replacement. At least it kept the rain out. That is until the rear
window mysteriously shattered. I was walking by the car when it
happened. Nobody else was around and I could find no evidence of foul
play to indicate that a foreign object had penetrated the glass. The
window just seemed to have had enough of that car.

It wasn't long before the front suspension decided to depart. If I
had intentions of making a turn, it was necessary to start turning
the steering wheel several blocks before said anticipated turn.
Steering became a fine art. I hated that car.

I was driving home from the grocery store when the engine quit on me.
I had the car towed home and I began to thoroughly check the motor
inside and out. I could find nothing wrong. I was sitting behind the
drivers seat when a neighbor asked, "You don't suppose it's out of
gas do you?"

I tapped at the gauge and said, "No. You can plainly see that it has
a quarter of a tank." No sooner had I spilled the words from my
mouth, my tapping dislodged the stuck gauge. It now read "Empty."

I had a can of gas that I used for filling the tank of my lawn mower
so I used the contents to get the Gremlin started. The gas gauge
barely registered as I headed for the gas station. I was about one
hundred feet from the pump when I ran out of gas again. I hated that
car.

Now it was war. I ran the car low on oil trying to kill it. The motor
ran fantastic. I ran it low on coolant but the engine never missed a
beat. I ran it low on oil and coolant at the same time and the motor
only seemed to run better. As the car fell apart around me, the motor
only became stronger but I still hated that car.

When I decided to sell it, a friend of mine offered to buy it. I told
him everything that was wrong with it and begged him not to buy it
from me. He really wanted the car and said he'd "fix it up." I tried
to give it to him but he said he wouldn't feel right not paying me
something for it. I ended up selling him the car for fifty dollars.

Two days after he bought the car it caught on fire in his driveway.
The Gremlin burned to the ground and in the process, it caught his
other car on fire. I took comfort in the knowledge that there were
then two of us who hated that car.


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